Sunday, January 28, 2007

Four Reasons Why a Man Might Cheat

Cheat and get caught and you'll pay the price, which is often the severing of a long-standing and loving relationship. Why take that risk? Not that this excuses him in any way, but here are four reasons a man might give to justify cheating on his wife, according to Men's Health editor-in-chief David Zinczenko, who is also the author of 'Men, Love & Sex: The Complete User's Guide for Women' and 'The Abs Diet' series of books.

1. To fulfill his biology
It's Darwinian! "A man's main job, besides killing the saber-tooth, is to spread his seed in order to ensure the survival of his genetic legacy," says Zinczenko. "It's a man's biology to want to wander." Of course, he's quick to point out that doesn't mean men should wander. Still, the biological urge will be strong.

(I can hear a throng of women mutter bullshit, but I'll remind you that you pull this card everytime you throw your babies in trash cans and start domestic assualts because your biology is making you be bad not that your choosing to be bad. In any case a man shouldn't be fucking you anyways since if all those nasty little chemicals created by those biological reactions makes you incapable of making good choices then if a guy fucked you, it would be like fucking you when your drunk. You'd call it rape the next day while most guys call it beer googles when they have bad hook ups. So ladies you were bitching about...)

2. To get attention
Some men cheat because they aren't having frequent sex at home, but others who do have frequent sex at home still cheat. Why? "Because cheating isn't just about the sex," asserts Zinczenko. "Just as a woman who cheats may be seeking more affection than she's getting at home, a man often cheats because he's seeking the attention that he no longer gets at home." A new woman has a certain allure and mystery. Add to that a bit of flirtatious seduction, and many men just can't resist -- no matter how good they have it at home.

(Yeah this one time I was reading a contradiction that turned into a retarded paradox of an arugement. Look if the man was getting attention at home and regular sex then he would not have to go out to and cheat to get sex and attention. If its really that good at home then a man will stay home. This one goes out to all honies making monies: IF YOU USED SEX TO SNATCH UP YOUR MAN AND THEN TOOK SEX OUT OF THE EQUATION REST ASSURED HE WILL TAKE YOU OF THE EQUATION AND PUT SOMEONE IN YOUR PLACE. As for the lure and mystery that really belongs under excitement, but I guess only having 3 points instead of 4 doesn't make for much of an article )

3. To get out
Some men want to get out of their marriage, but they don't have the guts to properly end it. So they cheat in an attempt to drive their wife away. For some men, "the only way out is to commit the relationship sin that drives a woman away for good. It's not right, but it's what happens," admits Zinczenko.

(Okay so some guys may cheat to get out. Really if she doesn't want to leave and it takes her twinkie eating ass to see you dogging two cheerleaders in bed seriously, just be sure to tell her not try cry on the way out as it will mess up the audio for the camcorder, and not bumping the camcorder would be a plus or it will fuck up the overall production value.)

4. To change up his play list
File this under excitement. A long and loving marriage is often about comfortable routine. For some men, that routine may be boring. A new relationship adds zing and spice to life. Take heart, wives. "What men really want in relationships (and what I suspect women also want) is to be able to take comfort in the routine of a long-term commitment, as long as there are some surprises that make it feel like a new relationship every once in a while," asserts Zinczenko

(Fuck changing the playlist, how about showing me where they put the mute button! I love it how they think that only wives need to keep the excitement going, having had some lackluster girlfriends who exciting to play with as the third string of 1986 Montreal Expo's I think a lot of guys would call for a change in the line up. No such thing as a new relationship, that vagina is not going to get any less stretched out from all that "experimentation" in college. You are not a car that can be reupholstered, but we can sure damn well trade you off like a used one.)

Want More Love? Go to AOL Personals.(There are plenty of 40 year old men claiming to be 18 horny 18 year old chicks its all yours.)

Seriously if women don't want men to cheat its easy. First don't bait and switch your personality or sex habits. Second don't try to change us, you liked at first for what we stood for, don't be retarded if you take away what you first liked you are not going to create something better Dr. Frankenslut. Finally space is key, trust me if you don't realize you need time apart your brain has spent to much time apart from your body. And if you get cheated on and your not married move on, if your married thats a tough one especially when there are kids but thats not my problem.

-Grey Fox

The Race to 2008: Initial Impressions

So, as we all know, there are less than two years remaining before Chimpy McFlightsuit leaves Washington, DC. Simultaneously, a number of "esteemed" candidates have staked their interest in taking over the White House. As such, I thought I'd share some humble impressions I've had so far about the pending election:

1) Come together RIGHT NOW, dammit - Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton - two names you've undoubtedly been overexposed to right now - are essentially running on mirror platforms right now which centers on bringing both sides of the aisle together to make our country better than before. Uhbama - a name I gave to him after seeing how often he says 'Uh' when speaking - touched on this U-N-I-T-Y concept back in 2004 when he was a candidate for the Senate speaking at the Democratic National Convention. As recently as yesterday Hillary did a similar thing when speaking at a High School in Iowa.

To me, there's a critical issue in running this type of platform. Attempting to appease both sides of the aisle won't work because much of the country will simply not vote in a particular way. Instead of reaching out to the same groups that have a part in keeping the Democrats out of the White House, perhaps their energy would be better spent getting more voters out instead. As of right now, an absurd percentage of the country doesn't even go out to vote. Tapping into this group may be key to victory, instead of trying the Kerry tactic of moderation.

2) Conservatives in moderate clothing - As a self proclaimed cynical libertarian, I don't see the particular appeal in any of the mainstream candidates at this point. That being said, the two front running candidates for the republican party (I'd say McCain and Romney) are being painted as moderates with little good reason to me. The fact is:

1) Romney is moderate because Mass. (a left leaning state) has forced it on him and
2) McCain looks moderate because the country's been run by ultra conservatives for the past few years.

At this point, I'd just say that anyone who is still regretful about 2000 should not let that keep them from looking closely at what the records state.

These are two thoughts I have for now on the topic. As we come closer to 2008 I'll have more. For now I'm going to bang my head into the wall or something.